I do not have photos to go with this post. You’re welcome.
It has been very hot weather in Seattle these past few days. We’re not used to the heat. Sunny days in Seattle are common in the summer, but many of us just can’t handle them. Any sustained temperatures over 85 can cause an unpredictable outcome.
A contributor told me a story about the 7 Local – Prentice Street to Rainier Beach. I personally won’t get on the 7. I’ve been on it before, and it is scary. People get stabbed on the 7. They get beat up on there. It’s historically in the top three most dangerous buses in Seattle – it’s up there with the old 358. Supposedly the A-Line RapidRide was the other one.
The contributor told me the story of how it was too hot to continue bicycling, so she and her husband decided to take the bus back home from wherever they'd gone. The bus stopped, they put their bikes on the front rack, and took their seats in the first forward facing seats. Smart move. Don’t sit in the back of the 7 unless you're looking for trouble.
A woman was seated in the sideways seats in front of them. She wasn’t old, but she wasn’t young. She didn’t look homeless or mentally impaired. She was wearing sweatpants and a cardigan.
Yes, that is an odd outfit for such a warm day. She was a special case.
Let's call her Jessie. I dislike that Jesse's Girl song and Rick Springfield. Even though Jesse was his friend's name in the song - a good friend - and his girl went unnamed, I'm still calling this bus character Jessie. Just because.
As the bus rolled forward, Jessie began squirming in her seat. She started taking off her sweatpants. Yes. Taking them off! She had a tough time with them and ended up having to put her legs in the air, moving dramatically about. Just like a snake molting. Finally, after several minutes of wrestling with the sweatpants, she was free of them.
And free of anything else below the waist.
Indeed, Jessie was butt naked, sitting on the dirty seat with her girl parts right on them. No barrier. No protection from the elements and germs. She melded with the nastiness of a million bus riders before her.
"You know I wish that I had Jessie's girl! Jessie's girl. Where can I find a woman like that?"
The woman who was sitting next to her turned her body toward the front of the bus, obviously disgusted by the naked lady’s presence. The contributor and her husband were shocked.
“Oh my God! Is that woman…?”
“She must be wearing short shorts? At least underwear?”
“Hold on! Look at that. Is that her…?”
As the naked lady turned slightly, her cardigan malfunctioned and a breast fell out. She wasn’t wearing an undershirt or tank top under the sweater. She was nude underneath. And she was very clearly exposing a nipple to the passengers around her.
So, let’s do a clothing inventory: Pants? No. Underpants? No. Shirt? No. Bra? No. Cardigan? Yes. Shoes? Maybe. (We didn’t cover that part of the story.)
You’re probably wondering what Jessie was doing after she disrobed. Nothing. She was sitting there like it was nothing. It was the most natural thing to ride the bus in the buff.
No one said anything to her, including the driver. Everyone just continued on with whatever they were doing, checking her out. I'm sure most people were too shocked, but then again they were on the 7.
The contributor told me that last week a man had his hand down his pants, very obviously masturbating with no shame. Now this week she saw Jessie - more of her than she wanted to. She should become a busworthy regular correspondent for sure!
Looks like the 7 has gotten a lot more liberated since I rode it last.
The contributor and her husband got off the bus before Jessie, which made them a little sad. They wanted to see what happened when she got off the bus. Who knows, but at least that Seattlelite knows how to beat the heat!
I hope she didn't lose her transfer when she shed her pants and her dignity.